Comments on: Does “Facebook” Destroy Marriages?

By: Richard

Richard — Tue, 13 Apr 2010 19:13:45 +0000

My wife used Facebook to find an old boyfriend to make me jealous because I did not take enough notice of her because I always had to work late to earn enough money to look after her and our three children. (We were married for 15 years) She didn’t actually want an affair but it actually destroyed our marriage from mistrust. Thanks Facebook!

By: The Macedonian

The Macedonian — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 03:02:38 +0000

All of you have made great points, there is always going to be a better and newer tool for communication. That will be used for good and evil. For me it is neat to see old friends or family that is living outside the US. Regardless if people want to cheat, they will cheat. Now we have Facebook and texting, before we had pagers and cellphones, it is a never ending communication cycle.

Rather then cheat on each other, sit down and work out your difference, life is not perfect nor is an relationship. A relationship is about balance, finding that balance is not always easy but it can be down with two people.

By: mattsummers

mattsummers — Sun, 03 Jan 2010 02:18:30 +0000

Stephen Stone: That’s the smartest stuff I’ve heard on Facebook’s relationship to marriage and marriage struggles. Thanks.

By: Stephen Stone

Stephen Stone — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 14:49:58 +0000

I think there is a great temptation here for spouses who are looking for an “escape” from their real life because real life is hard. When you are a spouse and a parent, real life places many demands on you, and often requires a lot of sacrifice and serving others. Real life also exposes a lot of your shortcomings, selfishness, and sins. The lure of sites like Facebook and MySpace is that you can escape that “real life” and control the way you market yourself to your “friends” — who often times people who do not even know the “real” you. In the “unreal world” of social networking, surface level friendships and superficial feedback, you can get such an inflated ego that you often actually justify living in a selfish way in the “real world” among your family and friends.

Social networking sites do not have to lead to an affair to destroy a marriage. If the site can succeed in convincing a parent and a spouse that it is a preferable place to be and spend their time than real life–and this results in detachment and disassociation from their spouse and their children (which ultimately disassociates them from God)–marriages can fall without an affair. Sadly, the one who is detached because of their social networking addiction will most likely blame the spouse who senses the danger and is begging and pleading with them to turn their heart back to proper channels as the problem. The social networking addict will say their spouse is being “controlling” if they point out the addiction, and will even justify separation and divorce rather than recognizing the damage their selfish habit is causing to those who *really* love them in the “real world”. They can become some so deceived that the superficial reward of the “friends” they have on Facebook becomes more appealing to them than the rewards of a healthy marriage and family.

Sure, the problem is the heart. But just like some people should avoid alcohol entirely, some people should avoid these sites entirely. If it causes you to sin, gouge it out and cut it off. Whether the sin is drunkenness, adultery, or turning from God and destroying a family, it must be put to death or it will result in death.

By: Darren

Darren — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 21:40:42 +0000

Go back to the 1960s, and the explosion of use of the birth control pill and the rapid increase in affairs and divorce. Ultimately sin is what destroys marriages, but if one is to look at a man made invention, you need look no further than the birth control pill to find the most devestating invention made by man (when it comes to marriages).

By: Raquel

Raquel — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 18:51:10 +0000

I believe that Facebook or other networking sites are just used out of convienence. They are easy to use by everyone and are there for you always. I believe that if you “cheat” on your spouse through one of these sites there is a deeper reason for it . I also believe that if your spouse finds out and wants to divorce you over it that they are being lazy. Marriage is not easy and has its ups and downs but you have to work at it. If your spouse has a roaming eye then you should find out if it’s fixable, not just throw your hands up and give up.

By: Mick

Mick — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 16:41:09 +0000

I think it does make it much easier for people to stray. You are constantly connected with people 24/7 just by simply having a profile, which allows people to comment at any time. Being more accessible in this way can be dangerous if it’s used for the wrong purpose. If it is just causing more of a divide in a marriage, then it needs to go. As well as a cell phone, a friendship, or anything of the sort. Marriage is a holy convenant between man, woman, and God. It should never be taken as lighlty.

By: Kamella

Kamella — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 03:45:10 +0000

I agree with Dena. Facebook is no more responsible than cell phones…or going out of the house on a grocery run.

By: Sean

Sean — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 03:25:57 +0000

I think that using FB as an excuse to get a divorce is pretty lameO. You may as well use the excuse that the sky is blue.

By: Dena

Dena — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 02:23:14 +0000

Married people have been cheating way before social networking sites were even around. I think these sites have made it a lot easier for people to stray, but I wouldn’t blame broken marriages on Facebook alone.